i. a. r. h. c. ART CRED

HER HAIR, HER SMOKE, HER DREAMS.

ultrice-blog:
""He was too strong." "

extollvd-blog:

“——- but not for you, right, Gray-sama?”

     eyes refused to blink, gaze fixed relentlessly on the male’s features, refusing to stray from those half lidded eyes she had loved for so many years. the area around the aforementioned feature felt stiff from a mess of tears and blood, long since dried. slowly, the filth was attacked, small parts of it being washed from her cheeks. it was raining from her eyes.

     two hands belonging to her moved to grasp one of his, her tight grip trying to speak the volumes her mouth couldn’t.

          i’m staying strong, just like you do.
               i’m staying strong for you.
                    i’ll never let go.
                         don’t leave me alone.

   his skin felt rough; covered in scratches, decorated with darkening bruises. his fingers were cold, weak. nevertheless, she told herself she could feel his usual warmth. he was surviving - of course he was, it was their two year anniversary soon. she had been in the sun for two years, and he had to be there to celebrate with her; she was going to knit him another scarf.

     she was going to do it properly this time. take him out to a restaurant, talk and laugh with him all afternoon, then enjoy his expression when she’ll present him with his gift. that small frown he would always show, one lacking any displeasure, and the hint of a blush she loved to see. it would go perfectly, as if they were a real couple. she was known for her fantasies, after all.

     so the bruises, the cuts, the wounds were temporary. he wouldn’t leave. she trusted him enough to know that he would never do that to her.

     a laugh escaped her, voice cracking under the raw emotion she was unable to suppress as she usually would, all the sadness and fear and pure horror she had locked away. although she didn’t want him to see her in such a pathetic state, she wanted him to know that she was real. genuine, true. she wanted to keep him there, because it would be such an honour to be his anchor.

    she knew it was selfish, she knew, she hated herself, but she continued hoping that soon he would sit up and smile, just for her. he would hold her and pick up the broken pieces she had become. he would save her, just like he always had.

          selfish, horrible, terrible, idiot——

     hunched over his figure, lying against the rock floor, skin pale and eyes vacant. her Gray-sama was still there. he still held her hand. he was still her’s and she was still his.

          “… no one is too strong for Gray-sama.”